So for whatever reasons they may have, some people are just not able to receive full throated love. Many people grow a shell around themselves to filter the love that they receive. Maybe they fear, once accepted, it will be withdrawn from them, so they measure how much they let in. We cannot break that shell. They have to choose to break it or keep it, but we can still love them from afar💖😇💖
Or they may not feel a connection to your kind of love or be in a place where it fits their wants/needs/lifestyle. That's okay. I think sometimes we try too hard to make something fit when it really doesn't - no blame, just a realization that we aren't each others cup of tea. Whenever I feel an end, I remember and offer Metta to them:
May you be happy
May you be healthy
May you be safe and protected
And may you live in this world with ease.
Exactly Carole. Let them go, but without anger or blame - just an understanding that this wasn't a good fit.
What an interesting point of view Aprille. I think I have been on both sides of this equation in the past, in a more romantic sense than friendship but it feels very similar. Your points make for interesting reading and I certainly spot where I may have fallen short of the mark in the past. I honestly think I am just oblivious rather than purposely giving off rejection vibes. Take your points 5 and 6, basically responding to compliments. I find this extremely difficult, I just don't know how to do it, I find it very awkward, it's probably something I should work on because it shouldn't feel difficult to receive and respond to a compliment! Thanks for leading me to this door.
I don't feel as if I am victimized here at all or that this is in any way intentional on their part - this is about what I need/want/desire/offer/accept in my relationships. If I continue to pursue relationships with people who don't feel the same, this is pointless and painful for us all in the end. This doesn't mean I love them less. It simply means I choose to share my energy and space with people who reciprocate what I am offering and desire in a relationship. A quote I often return to is "Not everyone is your cup of tea." By seeking out and pursuing relationships with people who are not "your cup of tea" you cannot make space for the ones that are and we all end up losing in the end. My writing was about recognizing what that means for you personally, about asking yourself what you want and need in a relationship, and then deciding if you are receiving/giving that in a positive energetic exchange. If it is not, it might be time to let go and move on with love, kindness, and compassion for all involved.
So for whatever reasons they may have, some people are just not able to receive full throated love. Many people grow a shell around themselves to filter the love that they receive. Maybe they fear, once accepted, it will be withdrawn from them, so they measure how much they let in. We cannot break that shell. They have to choose to break it or keep it, but we can still love them from afar💖😇💖
Or they may not feel a connection to your kind of love or be in a place where it fits their wants/needs/lifestyle. That's okay. I think sometimes we try too hard to make something fit when it really doesn't - no blame, just a realization that we aren't each others cup of tea. Whenever I feel an end, I remember and offer Metta to them:
May you be happy
May you be healthy
May you be safe and protected
And may you live in this world with ease.
Exactly Carole. Let them go, but without anger or blame - just an understanding that this wasn't a good fit.
What an interesting point of view Aprille. I think I have been on both sides of this equation in the past, in a more romantic sense than friendship but it feels very similar. Your points make for interesting reading and I certainly spot where I may have fallen short of the mark in the past. I honestly think I am just oblivious rather than purposely giving off rejection vibes. Take your points 5 and 6, basically responding to compliments. I find this extremely difficult, I just don't know how to do it, I find it very awkward, it's probably something I should work on because it shouldn't feel difficult to receive and respond to a compliment! Thanks for leading me to this door.
I don't feel as if I am victimized here at all or that this is in any way intentional on their part - this is about what I need/want/desire/offer/accept in my relationships. If I continue to pursue relationships with people who don't feel the same, this is pointless and painful for us all in the end. This doesn't mean I love them less. It simply means I choose to share my energy and space with people who reciprocate what I am offering and desire in a relationship. A quote I often return to is "Not everyone is your cup of tea." By seeking out and pursuing relationships with people who are not "your cup of tea" you cannot make space for the ones that are and we all end up losing in the end. My writing was about recognizing what that means for you personally, about asking yourself what you want and need in a relationship, and then deciding if you are receiving/giving that in a positive energetic exchange. If it is not, it might be time to let go and move on with love, kindness, and compassion for all involved.